From Victim, to Survivor, to Thriver

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Testimony By Aime Hutton

My name is Aime Hutton, I am in Calgary Alberta, Canada.  I have a story that I would like to share with you.  I am a survior to thrivor from dating abuse/stalking in university.  Thank you for this opportunity to share my story.  Knowing that we are not alone.

My story is that we met in first year university while living away from home on campus.  He was sweet, and loving caring.  Then things got strange.  I noticed that he was wanting to know where I was all the time.  He got jealous when I was watching movies with actors in it that I found attractive.  And he also had a temper.  One night he and I were invited to another part of campus my boyfriend got angry at our friend and threw his keys at our friend.  Our friend said “Don’t throw things!”, he then looked at me then back at my boyfriend, and said “Don’t throw things ever.”  There were other times when I was scared of him, and hid on campus trying to get away from him.

The night I will never forget though is when we were out with a group of friends dancing at the pub.  I was down on the dance floor having fun with others.  I looked up to the balcony (where my boyfriend was), and waved at him to come and join us.  I got glared at and with his hand actions he demanded that I come to him at once.  I finished dancing to the song then went to see him.  He just stared at me, and said to me “You know that I can’t dance.”  He was angry, as we walked back to the dorms he was muttering under his breath.  My stomach was doing flip flops.  Once back in the dorm, by my bedroom he spun me around and backed me up against the wall.  Slamming his hands up by my face on the wall, he said to me “I love you, I don’t want to be with anyone else but you.”  He leaned in and put his hands on my cheeks, he kissed me and slid his hands down to my neck and squeezed.  Luckily he let go quickly.  I couldn’t move, or yell out.  I was able to end our relationship inbetween 1 and 2 of university.  Although I was still friends with others who were friends with him.

Then he also stalked me for the remaining years of university.  He would show up in places on campus where I was.  I felt like I was walking on egg shells when on campus.  I walked everywhere with the walk safe program at night.  And there was one night in the fourth year of university when my friends who I lived with on campus had him over for supper.  I stayed in my bedroom all night.  Didn’t even come out for supper.  My one room mate stuck her head in my room and said to me that it’s been 3 years, get over it already.

It took years to heal, with counselling and also personal development courses.

What am I doing now?  I am the Canadian Ambassador for the Freedom and Empowerment Teen Campaign.  A global campaign to support, educate, and empower those who have been through dating violence and domestic abuse.  As the Teen Ambassador speaking to the next generation and other caring adults with education and awareness about the waring signs of abuse, and the different kinds of abuse.  One of the keys to help stop the cycle of abuse is with education.

5 thoughts on “From Victim, to Survivor, to Thriver

  1. Thank YOU so much for allowing us to share our stories. I am the writer of this post who shared her story. I invite you to contact me to come and speak with your group/organization/school.
    Have me come to your event to share my 3 wishes of how to end the cycle of abuse in the next generation.

  2. Thank you for sharing this, Aime. It’s so important for all of us who have been through sexual violence or abuse of any kind to hear stories of moving from surviving to thriving. I’m happy for you and thrilled that you’re working to make a difference for others who are coming out of the darkness.

    • Thanks Diane. Yes one step at a time I choose to be the phoneix and rise above the ashes every time. Empowering our next generation to know they are not alone, what ever it takes I will keep spreading the message.

  3. Aime Hutton I am so proud of you for how far you have come in such a short space of time. I am so honoured to see you shine like the bight star that you are and I am forever greatful to have you in our team. This is just the beginning my darling. This journey your on will take you so far you will be able to touch the stars, and I will be right at the side of you watching you shine.

    Your amazing amazing and I love you x

    • Thanks Miss Kate……truly I do thank YOU. Means a lot. Step by step, we will ripple out to others with the message of the Freedom and Empowerment Teen Campaign. What else is possible? 🙂 Hugs and love back to YOU!

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